{"product_id":"hide-and-seek-world-champion","title":"HIDE AND SEEK WORLD CHAMPION","description":"\u003ch3 class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchorContainer\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDepartment of Unclear Intentions — Field Achievement Series\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAfter decades of intensive competition, thousands of alleged sightings, several blurry photographs, and exactly zero successful post-match interviews, the reigning champion remains undefeated.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003eHide and Seek World Champion\u003c\/strong\u003e badge commemorates the unparalleled athletic accomplishments of North America's most elusive recreational participant.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"\"\u003eOfficial Department records indicate that the current champion has successfully employed a number of advanced hiding techniques, including dense woodland concealment, strategic ridge-line positioning, remaining approximately forty feet outside camera focus, and simply leaving before anyone gets there.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHis championship record has been challenged repeatedly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNo challenger has successfully located him to file the paperwork.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDEPARTMENT CLASSIFICATION:\u003c\/strong\u003e Cryptozoological Athletics\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEVENT:\u003c\/strong\u003e Competitive Hide \u0026amp; Seek\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCURRENT TITLE HOLDER:\u003c\/strong\u003e Undisclosed\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCAREER RECORD:\u003c\/strong\u003e Undefeated\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVERIFIED APPEARANCES:\u003c\/strong\u003e Pending\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE:\u003c\/strong\u003e Technically\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNEXT TOURNAMENT:\u003c\/strong\u003e Location withheld\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWear this badge as recognition of Sasquatch's extraordinary commitment to competitive excellence—or as evidence that the Department continues allocating resources to programs nobody remembers authorizing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDepartment of Unclear Intentions\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eWe Know Something. Probably.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Department of Unclear Intent","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":52911905472823,"sku":null,"price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1006\/4507\/7303\/files\/44fc9aa7-56be-46a8-97aa-d283effd82f6.jpg?v=1787930703","url":"https:\/\/departmentofunclearintent.com\/products\/hide-and-seek-world-champion","provider":"Department of Unclear Intent","version":"1.0","type":"link"}